Detective Max…

Posted on May 31, 2007. Filed under: Journal from behind the desk... |


A word of advice, don’t try lying to your heath care professional….

Two reasons –

Firstly: We actually want to help you. So why tell us porky-pies.

Secondly: You’re not the first person to pull a fast one nor will you be the last.  We are masters in communication skills, and we know B.S.  when we hear it.

We are good detectives, it’s our job.  We have diagnosed your torticolis, depression and alcohol problem before you’ve got in the room.  We saw your limp, noticed the blood, identified the rash before you sat down.  Private investigators have nothing on us…

The reason I mention this is-

“It was a sunny day when he walked into my office, I could tell by the way he coughed his chest was in a bad way. I asked if he smoked, he said no.

I know this is not true… does he have tell tail signs?

Stained fingers, nicotine malodour, skin that looks older than the person wearing it….No, actually he does not.

So how did I know???

….Pack o’ cigs in his top pocket!!

“Oh, those…Well yeah, I ‘ave one or two, any’ow I’m quittin’ soon”.

So I go on to tell him about our range of services available to aid him stopping.

“I ain’t having any of those Nico’een patches, they nearly killed a friend of mines ‘usband” – the patient is unsure how, but insists they “nearly killed ‘im”

Did the friends husband try to smoke them I wonder, or did his wife put the sticky patch over his mouth to stop him smoking and also obstruct his airway? That’d nearly kill him.

The morale of the story is don’t tell us fib’s…(We are the latest in the CSI franchise – Clinical Scene Investigation)C.S.I. Crime Scene Investigation - The Complete Sixth Season

Enough from me…..

Kim’s been at it again with – cos So off you pop…. come back soon…

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One Response to “Detective Max…”

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funny, detective. and yeah, the cigarette. some patients don’t have a clue how it got to their pockets:)


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