At home with Max…

Posted on July 26, 2007. Filed under: At home... |

It’s a little unlike me to mix my blog with home life, usually very work orientated but I felt the need to off load my home life for a change – this goes on a bit, and I apologies, normal service will resume next week…..

We are in the process of exchanging contract with view to moving to a nicer house in the countryside.

At 16.30 yesterday we had someone who wants our house, and we have somewhere to go. It’s a nice short chain involving 3 properties only.  We were in that short quiet phase where all the surveys are being completed and the legal stuff gets sorted.

At 16.35 yesterday our buyer pulled out, making several lame excuses including the fact the garage is not in view from the house, so he couldn’t see his car and so was concerned re: security.  This is a lame excuse, put your freakin’ car in the garage – and anyway, you don’t have a car!

My loving spouse was in tears, she is besotted with our potential new house, and gutted that we might lose it. Our house was on the market for ages and despite huge amounts of interest, only one offer was made.

At 16.40 (having just got in from work – and from having an amazingly challenging day – I’ll tell you another time), I was instructed to go to my dad’s to pick up the lawn mower. 


Crisis management – get the bloody lawn cut ASAP our house is about to go back on the market, and it looks a mess.  Now I did have my own lawn mower, but 1 week ago my father in law blew it up. (To quote my daughter “Papa made smoke come out”).  So I borrowed one from some friends 2 days ago, so kind “papa” tried to cut the lawn again yesterday – instead he cut the cable!!  He has gone through a lawn mower a week for the last two weeks!

At 16.45 we sold our house (again), to somebody who was interested weeks ago, but couldn’t commit then, but can now. (and they put in a higher offer than the one we’d accepted and just lost! – ssshhhh!)

Immense relief!  My wife was shaking. Too much emotion for 10 minutes!

Later that evening we opened a bottle of wine, and somehow we got back round to a familiar subject – eternity rings. Now I know that rings are important symbolism to women.

I am married, and in this day and age lots of marriages break down, sometimes because people change, sometimes because people don’t realise they are marrying an arsehole. 

 I made my commitment….


…and I plan to stick by that.  Everyone that knows my wife and I, knows that we have had our ups and downs – and I don’t mean the usual shit of arguements and flings – We argue (apparently it is healthy), and to the best of my knowledge neither of us have had flings. I’m talking life shattering, wondering if you wife is going to live through the night kind of ups and downs. (to mention just one of two major life traumas we’ve experienced since we were  married only 5 years ago).  It may sound egotestical (purposally mispelt) but I believe many a weaker marriage would have ended a long time ago.

All I am saying is I am committed for life, but eternity?  Jeees! That’s like forever and ever.  Now I am not saying I am convinced by an after life, anyone that reads on this page knows I am a cynic, but if there is a heaven – perhaps you get to have guilt free sex with angelic beings on tap. 

“Oh, sorry sir, not you, it states in the small print you have committed yourself to another for eternity”

Full of men who bought eternity rings.

My wife called me selfish. I felt like pointing out how much of a rollercoaster ride we’d had in the 10minutes between 16.35 and 16.45, and how that emphasised how long a life time commitment was, let alone eternity.  But alas eternity in heaven with sex on tap would be no fun without my genitals – so I kept quiet!

I don’t expect I’ve heard the last of this.

I go to work for the peaceful atmosphere…

Incidentally I cut the grass anyway, and “Papa” has organised to have our friends lawn mower repaired, and aquired us a free one!

Change of Shift is up and worth a read as always…very colourful!! 


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One Response to “At home with Max…”

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Love the eternity rings! Glad my marriage states that it only lasts “till death us do part”.

If the ring looks nice, just buy it and throw away the “eternity” thing!

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