Half of all adults could be clinically obese by 2050.

Posted on October 18, 2007. Filed under: Apply topically |

Oh cracking! Another piece of quality “government research” has been fed to the media in an attempt to scare us….Yes “half of all adults could be clinically obese by 2050”.  When I heard this my immediate concern was….Oh my god which half?

Half Fat!

There I am on New Years Eve 2049, my usual slim physique, then midnight strikes on Big Ben… I lean to kiss my wife and “SPLUNPH!” Half of all adults are obese. The kiss continues, she runs her hand down my slender back, but suddenly her hand gets stopped by the barrier that is my butt. 

Please to see you?

“Oh my god it’s true, half of all adults are obese – and it’s my lower half!”  Still it could be worse, think of the strain on my slender legs, if my top half became obese! 

What’s that you say? Oh I see! Half of the adult population will be obese! Phew what a relief! So I stop panicing…

…but what’s this… Alan Johnson Secretary of State for Health has added his comments that Obesity is as serious a threat as climate change.

Mr Johnson…double chinned and too lazy to walk into the building!

What a bizarre statement….lets have that again: “Obesity is as serious a threat as climate change”.

Is this because fat people leave a deeper carbon foot print, or something to do with fat people farting more than skinny folks?  No! Fair enough, it is not saying that fat people will have an effect on climate change (that’ll be the next “government research” paper), but that obesity is as serious a threat….to what? I don’t know?

…Hang on!  Global warming, massive amounts of the planet flooding as polar ice caps melt, while massive areas become over heated and dessert like.  Potentially half of the UK flooded  verses  half of the UK being chubby…

No I’m struggling to see the comparison….oh I get it. Too many fat people to fit into the UK, so we export them to the north pole, where they have to open lots of McDonalds, and the heat from all that frying causes the ice caps to melt, or perhaps the UK floods as the Island sinks under the weight of so many fat people?

No I don’t get it! Sorry.

Lets look back…in Jan 2004…..we were advised that global warming was a more serious threat than terrorism.  Therefore according to this logic, fat people are more a threat than terrorists!  Personally I’d rather sit next to a fat person on a plane!

Watch out for fat terrorist, highly dangerous!

Talking of dangerous….Change of shift is out, which leaves you in danger of spending the whole day reading, and getting absolutely nothing else done!  Enjoy.


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3 Responses to “Half of all adults could be clinically obese by 2050.”

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excellent ~ hey, in Australia the headlines are now “Obesity takes over smoking as No 1 Killer”
read this two ways, picture a race with a very fat person and a lifesize cigarette they have in those nicorette ads, both running with guns and towards YOU! who will kill you first? ha!
Ironically, isn’t it wild when, after this gripping headline jangles in your ear you see a very obese person… smoking! a double whammy… tsk tsk… feel like running up them and yelling “are u suicidal or what?”

finally got to your blog Max – yay a day off !

[…] on November 1st, 2007. Recently I was discussing that half of all adult could be obese by 2050, this led to Jai from NurseAussie and I having a natter on Facebook. (What do you mean you […]

2050 Hmmmm, once again, I’m ahead of the pack!

Adrienne Zurub,RN,MA,CNOR (just consonants and a couple of nouns folks)
‘cardiac bitch’
‘NOtes From the Mothership The Naked Invisibles’ coming January 2008
(tales of nursing, identity, and ME of course!)

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